"SO I SAID TO NIK, DON'T LOSE YOUR HEAD WITH PEOPLE, I'M NOT ALWAYS GOING TO BE ABOUT TO BAIL YOU OUT!!"

BOB ATTEMPTS TO RECREATE THE GOLDEN DAYS OF THE VARIETY SHOW. THE BEARS BEHIND LOOK NONE TOO IMPRESSED

WITH  TURNER OUT OF THE BAND, IT WAS LEFT TO BOB TO PUT THE WIND IN HAWKWIND. THIS IS NOT A REFERENCE TO THE TRUMPET THAT THE GREAT MAN IS HOLDING, INSTEAD THE FACT THAT BOB COULD "ALLEGEDLY" FART LIKE A TROOPER!

QUITE WHAT BOB IS DOING HERE, WE ARE NOT ENTIRELY SURE. OUR BEST EXPLANATION IS THAT ONE TIME JUDAS PRIEST VOCALIST, ROB HALFORD APPEARS TO HAVE SECRETED HIMSELF INTO THE ATOMHENGE STAGE SET, WITH JUST HIS HEAD STICKING OUT OF THE CONSTRUCTION. WE BELIEVE THAT MR CALVERT IS SAYING IS SOMETHING ALONG THE LINES OF - "OI, HALFORD GET OUT OF ME F*****G STAGE SET, YOU HEAVY METAL BANDS MIGHT HAVE LOADS OF LIGHTS, BUT WE'VE GOT OUR VERY OWN SPACE AGE REPRESENTATION OF STONE HENGE, SO YOU CAN STICK THAT IN YOUR PIPE AND SMOKE IT, NOW BUGGER OFF!"

SIMON KING AND PAUL RUDOLPH LOOK SUITABLY EMBARRASSED

"POWER TO THE PEOPLE"

ANYBODY ELSE THINK BOB HAS A STRIKING RESEMBLANCE TO BRITISH ACTOR ROBERT LINDSAY IN HIS PORTRAYAL OF CULT COMEDY HERO CITIZEN SMITH IN THIS PICTURE

"FREEDOM FOR TOOTING!"

NO, NOT A SHOT OF BOB PERFORMING THE TRACK STEPPENWOLF WITH THE BAND, INSTEAD ANOTHER OF THE MANS EXTRA CIRRICULAR ACTIVITIES. TO BOOST THE MEAGRE WAGES HE WAS PAID BY THE BAND, HE ALSO WORKED AS A PART TIME FUNERAL DIRECTOR AND IS SEEN HERE ADDRESSING A LARGE GROUP OF MOURNERS, HENCE THE MICROPHONE, COMPLETE WITH "VERY EAVY STAND"

"I'VE GOT YOU IN ME SIGHTS BROCK"

BOB DECIDES DESPERATE MEASURES ARE REQUIRED TO SETTLE DISAGREEMENTS OVER THE FINAL MIXES ON QUARK STRANGENESS AND CHARM